Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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