Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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