Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
He just walked up to me in the kitchen, pulled out his penis and stuck it in my sweatpants pocket.
It was probably cold. Sweatpants pockets are notoriously warm.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
