let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
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