Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
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You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
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Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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