He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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