No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Randomize
