sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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