you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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