yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Randomize
