So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
