I molested 6 butterflies tonight
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize