But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Randomize
