im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
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I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
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dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
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