well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I just found little boats floating in my bathtub....they are made out of white castle boxes, condoms, pickles, and corks. All the wine we bought is being used as the "ocean"....clearly we didn't drink any of the wine.....but I don't remember doing this.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
