just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I just gargled with NyQuil
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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