I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
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