is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
