she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
