sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.