You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
