STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
It's blow job season.
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
