He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
