It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
