i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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