i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
