If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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