he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
She's like a pop up book from hell.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Randomize
