so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
