we have pet lesbian snakes
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
