exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
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