i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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