I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
