actually, I'm a sock model
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
