Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Randomize
