thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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