i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I'm drinking keystone with a homeless man I found. It's making me feel uncomfortable.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
