I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Randomize