I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
she peed on how many people?
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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