Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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