So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
he had hair everywhere except his balls
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
