do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
i barfeds in our rink
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Randomize
