haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
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