do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
