We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
