Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Randomize
