is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
