What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Welp...herpes.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
