Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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