If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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