I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
so much tequila, so little girl.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
