I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I'm really busy with my period
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