Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
