kristin has been a bad kristin
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
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